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Trail: StJTB painters Book20 10 1971-06-02 PrintOnDemand RulesOfAcquisition

RulesOfAcquisition

Reference

 Rule 001	 »	Once you have their money, you never give it back.
 Rule 002	 »	The best deal is the one that brings the most profit.
 Rule 003	 »	Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.
 Rule 004	 »	A woman wearing clothes is like a man in the kitchen.
 Rule 005	 »	If you can't break a contract, bend it.
 Rule 006	 »	Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.
 Rule 007	 »	Keep your ears open.
 Rule 008	 »	Small print leads to large risk.
 Rule 009	 »	Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.
 Rule 010	 »	Greed is eternal.
 Rule 011	 »	Even if it's free, you can always buy it cheaper.
 Rule 012	 »	Anything worth doing is worth doing for money.
 Rule 013	 »	Anything worth doing is worth doing twice.
 Rule 014	 »	Keep your family close, keep your Latinum closer.
 Rule 015	 »	Acting stupid is often smart.
 Rule 016	 »	A deal is a deal. (until a better one comes along).
 Rule 017	 »	A contract is a contract is a contract - but only between Ferengi.
 Rule 018	 »	A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all.
 Rule 019	 »	Satisfaction is not guaranteed.
 Rule 020	 »	Only give money to people you know you can steal from.
 Rule 021	 »	Never place friendship before profit.
 Rule 022	 »	A wise man can hear profit in the wind.
 Rule 024	 »	Latinum can't buy happiness, but you can sure have a blast renting it.
 Rule 025	 »	There's always a way out.
 Rule 026	 »	As the customers go, so goes the wise profiteer.
 Rule 027	 »	There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman.
 Rule 028	 »	Whisper your way to success.
 Rule 029	 »	What's in it for me?
 Rule 030	 »	Talk is cheap; synthehol costs money.
 Rule 031	 »	Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother. (insult something he cares about, instead).
 Rule 032	 »	Be careful what you sell. It may do exactly what the customer expects.
 Rule 033	 »	It never hurts to suck up to the boss.
 Rule 034	 »	War is good for business.
 Rule 035	 »	Peace is good for business.
 Rule 036	 »	Too many Ferengi can't laugh at themselves anymore.
 Rule 037	 »	If it's free, take it and worry about hidden costs later.
 Rule 039	 »	Friendship is temporary; profit is forever.
 Rule 040	 »	She can touch your lobes, but never your Latinum.
 Rule 041	 »	Profit is its own reward.
 Rule 042	 »	What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine too.
 Rule 043	 »	Caressing an ear is often more forceful than pointing a weapon.
 Rule 044	 »	Never confuse wisdom with luck.
 Rule 045	 »	Ambition knows no family.
 Rule 046	 »	Make your shop easy to find.
 Rule 047	 »	Don't trust a man wearing a better suit than your own.
 Rule 048	 »	The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife.
 Rule 049	 »	Everything is worth something to somebody.
 Rule 050	 »	Gratitude can bring on generosity.
 Rule 051	 »	Reward anyone who adds to your profits so they will continue to do so.
 Rule 052	 »	Never ask when you can take.
 Rule 057	 »	Good customers are as rare as Latinum, Treasure them.
 Rule 058	 »	There is no substitute for success.
 Rule 059	 »	Free advice is seldom cheap.
 Rule 060	 »	Keep your lies consistent.
 Rule 061	 »	Never buy what can be stolen.
 Rule 062	 »	The riskier the road, the greater the profit.
 Rule 065	 »	Win or lose, there's always Huyperian beetle snuff.
 Rule 068	 »	Ear stroking will get you anything.
 Rule 069	 »	Ferengi are not responsible for the stupidity of other races.
 Rule 070	 »	Get the money first, then let the buyers worry about collecting the merchandise.
 Rule 071	 »	There's a customer born every minute.
 Rule 072	 »	Never trust your customers.
 Rule 073	 »	If it gets you profit, sell your own mother.
 Rule 075	 »	Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of Latinum.
 Rule 076	 »	Every once in a while, declare peace. "It confuses the hell out of your enemies".
 Rule 077	 »	It's better to swallow your pride than to lose your profit.
 Rule 078	 »	When the going gets tough, the tough change the Rules.
 Rule 079	 »	Beware of the Vulcan greed for knowledge.
 Rule 082	 »	The flimsier the product, the higher the price.
 Rule 084	 »	A friend is not a friend if he asks for a discount.
 Rule 085	 »	Never let the competition know what you're thinking.
 Rule 087	 »	A friend in need means three times the profit.
 Rule 089	 »	Ask not what your profits can do for you, ask what you can do for your profits.
 Rule 092	 »	There are many paths to profit.
 Rule 093	 »	Act without delay! The sharp knife cuts quickly.
 Rule 094	 »	Females and finances don't mix.
 Rule 095	 »	Expand or die.
 Rule 096	 »	For every Rule, there is an equal and opposite Rule, (except when there's not).
 Rule 097	 »	Enough... is never enough.
 Rule 098	 »	Every man has his price.
 Rule 099	 »	Trust is the biggest liability of all.
 Rule 100	 »	If they take your first offer, you either asked too little or offered too much.
 Rule 101	 »	The only value of a collectible is what you can get somebody else to pay for it.
 Rule 102	 »	Nature decays, but Latinum lasts forever.
 Rule 103	 »	Sleep can interfere with...
 Rule 104	 »	Faith moves mountains... (of inventory).
 Rule 105	 »	Don't trust anyone who trusts you.
 Rule 106	 »	There is no honor in poverty.
 Rule 107	 »	A warranty is valid only if they can find you.
 Rule 109	 »	Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack.
 Rule 111	 »	Treat people in your debt like family, exploit them [ruthlessly].
 Rule 112	 »	Never have sex with the boss' sister.
 Rule 113	 »	Always have sex with the boss.
 Rule 115	 »	The best contract always has a lot of fine print.
 Rule 116	 »	There's always a catch.
 Rule 117	 »	Everything is for sale, including friendship.
 Rule 119	 »	Never judge a customer by the size of his wallet, (...sometimes, good things come in small packages).
 Rule 121	 »	Everything is for sale, including friendship.
 Rule 123	 »	Even a blind man can recognize the glow of Latinum.
 Rule 125	 »	You can't make a deal if you're dead.
 Rule 126	 »	Count it.
 Rule 127	 »	Stay neutral in conflict so that you can sell supplies to both sides.
 Rule 135	 »	Never trust a beneficiary.
 Rule 139	 »	Wives serve, brothers inherit.
 Rule 141	 »	Only fools pay retail.
 Rule 142	 »	There's no such thing as an unfair advantage.
 Rule 143	 »	Risk is part of the game... play it for all it's worth.
 Rule 144	 »	There's nothing wrong with charity...as long as it winds up in your pocket.
 Rule 146	 »	Necessity, n. The mother of invention. Profit is the father.
 Rule 152	 »	A lie is a way to tell the truth to someone who doesn't know.
 Rule 153	 »	Sell the sizzle, not the steak.
 Rule 162	 »	Even in the worst of times, someone turns a profit.z
 Rule 168	 »	Whisper your way to success.
 Rule 169	 »	Competition and fair play are mutually exclusive.
 Rule 171	 »	Blood is thicker than water, and Latinum is thicker than both.
 Rule 172	 »	Chances aren't what they used to be.
 Rule 177	 »	Know your enemies... but do business with them always.
 Rule 181	 »	Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit. 
 Rule 188	 »	A fool and his money is the best customer.
 Rule 189	 »	Let others keep their reputation. You keep their money.
 Rule 190	 »	Hear all, trust nothing.
 Rule 191	 »	A Ferengi waits to bid until his opponents have exhausted themselves.
 Rule 192	 »	Never cheat a Klingon... unless you're sure you can get away with it.
 Rule 194	 »	It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in your door.
 Rule 200	 »	If you're going to have to endure, make yourself comfortable.
 Rule 202	 »	The justification of profit is profit.
 Rule 203	 »	New customers are like razor-backed Gree worms... They can be succulent, but sometimes they bite back!
 Rule 204	 »	It takes a Ferengi to cheat a Ferengi.
 Rule 208	 »	Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than a question is an answer.
 Rule 211	 »	Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success... don't hesitate to step on them.
 Rule 212	 »	Never give away for free what can be sold.
 Rule 214	 »	Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach.
 Rule 216	 »	Never gamble with an empath.
 Rule 217	 »	You can't free a fish from water.
 Rule 218	 »	Always know what you're buying
 Rule 219	 »	Possession is 11/10 of the law.
 Rule 223	 »	Beware the man who doesn't make time for oo-mox.
 Rule 229	 »	Latinum lasts longer than lust.
 Rule 231	 »	There's a sucker born every minute; be sure you're the first to find each one.
 Rule 236	 »	You can't buy fate.
 Rule 239	 »	Never be afraid to mislabel a product.
 Rule 241	 »	Never trust a hardworking employee.
 Rule 242	 »	More is good... all is better.
 Rule 253	 »	Synthehol is the lubricant of choice for a customer's stuck purse.
 Rule 255	 »	A wife is a luxury... a smart accountant, a necessity.
 Rule 256	 »	Accountants do not play the game; they only keep the score.
 Rule 260	 »	Life's not fair. How else would you turn a profit?
 Rule 261	 »	A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience.
 Rule 262	 »	A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.
 Rule 263	 »	Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for Latinum.
 Rule 265	 »	The customer is always right, (...until you get their cash).
 Rule 266	 »	When in doubt, lie.
 Rule 267	 »	If you believe it, they believe it.
 Rule 270	 »	In business deals, a disruptor can be almost as important as a calculator.
 Rule 277	 »	Anything worth fighting for is worth hiding from.
 Rule 284	 »	Deep down, everyone's a Ferengi.
 Rule 285	 »	No good deed ever goes unpunished.
 Rule 286	 »	When Morn leaves, it's all over. (Quark made this rule up)
 Rule 299	 »	Whenever you exploit someone, it never hurts to thank them. That way, it's easier to exploit them the next time. (Neelix made this rule up)
 The Unwritten Rule     »      When no appropriate Rule applies, make one up!