I will be glad when capitalism is over. I am eager to try a new system. It seems that consumer culture is out of control. I bet people have been saying that for decades.
--cut--
Lately, and by lately i mean the last few years... It’s as if,... as if , if it’s not in here then i doesn’t mean anything. My art, my love, my work. all joined in here. but there is no here here. it could all go up in a puff of smoke. i guess that is possible no matter what the medium. perhaps, after all, unification is a scary thing. but if i am always looking inward... is that,... good?
I wonder what it is like to have a life outside of here? sometimes. i wonder that. am i trapped by my own dreams? i try to think back to before it all happened and i wonder was i happier? was i fulfilled? my instict, or hindsight or whatever you want to call it tells me “no” but are these just the words of a hopeless computer addict? haha! a new hindsight is needed!
More than anything I would like to see the cherry blossoms in Kyoto.
--cut--
This is a test. But I meant what I said.
I shouldn’t be afraid to quote things. Quoting is good. visual quotations.
NotesForANewE8Z
Today I fixed up the wireless modem. Gave it a nice sensible password so that the whole neighborhood couldn’t access our network. Went out. To the Library. Wanted Lolita but ended up with Orlando. Will make nice reading while I am laid up in the hospital.
Think I will work a bit more on the extensions I programmed the other day, make some more NotesForANewE8Z and go play some Pikmin before dinner. Yeah I am feeling just that disconnected from work. I guess this is how it works. The poor get poorer (and fatter) I weighed 62kg this morning! michael is just this side of 70! life! I just want us to always be happy. not like today. today is quite obviously, the day before.
ゆめどいかい
ゆめじゃないよ
そのしょこんゃ
ちだらけのさとな
にさん
なのはなしだい？
-do i continue to dream my small dreams? or not.
-many japanese designers i admire are going to be speaking at GDC. i am trying not to care.
now it is The Day After
I have a little headache
from all the verdoving
It was a strange way to spend a day
by 10:30 they had wheeled me into the operating room and strapped
me down
I awoke with pink residue on my thighs. But otherwise feeling much better.
I do think this will have solved the problem.
she said she took a biopsy and the rest she laser’d off and i am to come and see her in two weeks no intercourse for two weeks but afterwards Michael and i should be very happy indeed.
okay i am gonna try to remember everything that happened in Maastricht.
we drove there.
parked the car
had to figure out how to get into the academy because it was after 5 and they locked the doors.
we had to look for annemie called her cell phone and got voice mail.
wandered over to the conservatory
asked someone, was directed to the auditorium
met annemie and she herded us to our apartment.
it was one of those marvels of dutch design. something that looks like high design but in reality is just plywood and carefully chosen minimalism. well done. it had a kitchen, a shower, a bedroom off to the side of a little sitting room. a bottle of water and a bottle of juice in the short refrigerator. tea and coffee and a pot for each. clean and well organized.
it was only a short walk back to the auditorium for tech check.
we gave the presentation from my computer so it wasn’t much problem. i had used some hack i found online so my ibook could do screen spanning (why isn’t that built in)
it was my first time using that Keynote program but i must say it worked out really well. normally Z! and i roll into conferences with a folder full of jpgs and movie files and of course, the demo on the pc but this time i wanted to do something different, special.
this conference was actually one that Michael and I were going to do. we had the idea back when we first started working on 8 and we had planned it out, started inviting speakers and everything but we couldn’t get it together because well, michael and i decided we would rather work on the game than do all the work necessary to get the conference funded, dealing with the funding here in belgium and the academy and universities in holland.
maaike and martijn had come to look at our game prototypes several times. we had become friends with them. they are doing PhD research work at the University of Maastricht, in game design and theory involving. it turned out that the
first we met up with martijn who was standing in the seating area talking with cris crawford. i recognized him immediately. i must have seen his picture more than a few times anyway.
we went over the presentation a few more times after dinner. altering the notes and figuring out who was going to say what. i had already decided to wear his business suit that he bought this summer for when we went to meetings with publishers. it looked good on me, especially with the tie.